Mercies new every morning..

"The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases, his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. 'The Lord is my portion,' says my soul, 'therefore I will hope in him.' " -- Lamentations 3: 22-26

Medical school has been an adventure for which one could never prepare. It is always stressful, always challenging, and always endless. Once you've cleared one hurdle, you have 0.25 seconds to celebrate before you have to jump over the next one. I feel like I'm running a marathon where the finish line is moving with me. Now that it's the end of April, we're coming down to crunch time. I have 3 days of actual class left and our final block of class exams in a week. Where as I should feel the load lighten from this great accomplishment my classmates and I will share, I know that the hardest is yet to come. The following seven weeks will consist of 4 shelf exams and a comprehensive exam of the last two years that must ALL be passed in order to sit for our boards in June that cover everything from the last two years (the biggest hurdle yet).

As you can see, I'm terrible in taking one day at a time. I've always looked ahead, always feared, always become overwhelmed. I have to constantly and consciously remind myself that I am in God's hands. My dad always says..."He hasn't taught you how to swim just to let you drown." While I know God has a plan, I can't help but feel undeserving. I know he CAN lead me through this, but why would he want to? I have done nothing but complain and slack and procrastinate for two years...am I deserving of this grace and mercy? I know that I will never be worthy of my Jesus' loving sacrifice, but I will try to humbly accept and humbly offer myself over and over again.

I would never have been this far without the hope that Jesus has called me to something greater. He chooses to love me everyday (for some reason), and I will choose to hope in Him everyday. Without my hope in Him, I HAVE NOTHING. Without that hope, my career choice, schooling, life, has all been for nothing. I am so thankful for His new mercies every morning that keep me going, keep me grounded, and keep me hoping.  The Lord is my portion, and I will hope in Him.

Welcome!

So...I love journals. I collect them. Do I write in them...no. This is my attempt to share life with you and maybe save a little paper...welcome to Investing Love! The life of a medical student is nothing fabulous, or interesting, or appealing. This will not be the blog to read if you're looking for a daily fix (I'm not that consistent or interesting), but it's my own space and something I'm excited about (for now)...Happy Thursday!